Sitting here reflecting on life and the changes that have happened to me in a few short months. I know I need to make some major decisions regarding my life and my health in the near future.
One of them is my job. I wonder how long I can keep it up working full-time. Mornings are so hard right now and it doesn't seem that the medicine I am taking is helping at this point. I know I need to be patient and wait, sometimes it takes as long as 6 months for it to work...if it's going to work. That doesn't help me now. The pain is now on both sides, affecting both hands and both feet. I was really hoping that it would spare my left side...I guess that's not meant to be.
I have to consider that I may have to drop to part-time and give up the position I love. It's not that I can't do the job, I can, but there are aspects of my job that require me to have strength and full use of my hands, which right now I don't have. I will give it my best while I can, pray for the meds to work, and deal with this decision when I know I can't give 100% anymore.
On a better note, Michael received a promotion at work! He worked long and hard for this and he's very happy about it! I'm happy for him.
Please keep me in your prayers. I hate to ask...I feel selfish. I need to slow the progression of this disease that I can feel eating away at my joints. I need for this medicine to work. I need reassurance for tomorrow. My faith is shakey and I need prayers for that.
Hi Jodie -
ReplyDeleteI will continue to pray for you; your health and decisions you have to make. I will also pray that God will give you the fatih you need to rely on Him during this time.
In 2 Samuel 22 David gives a song of praise to God for delivering him from the hands of Saul. In verse 7 he says: "In my distress I called upon the Lord, and cried to my God: and He did hear my voice out of His temple, and my cry did enter into His ears." Although David's situation is quite different, the praise remains the same. Cry out to God Jodie. He does hear you. Verse 2 says "The Lord is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer." He may not grant your requests the way you want right now, but He will answer you the way that is best for you. Share your heart with Him and then listen for what He has to say. See how He chooses to deliver you. Remember God has promised "I will never leave you nor forsake you. (Heb 13:5). God loves you and will not let you do this alone. Trust Him to bring you through this and give you what you need during your suffering.
I pray that you may see God in a beautiful way today.
Love you.